Biblical Advice on HVAC

Something created this crazy world we live in but unlike those old-time hellfire and brimstone preachers, I do not think that the higher power intended for us to suffer.

I think the higher power, or God, wants us all to be happy.

Part of God’s plan, aside from our happiness, is that we stay comfortable in our homes and places of worship. I suppose humanity had to prove its worthiness for a few millennia before God allowed the development of HVAC, but I’m glad we have it. But what does the Bible say about HVAC? Everyone knows that the best-selling book of all time is the Holy Bible. It has some great stories and dispenses some great advice between all the “smiting” and “begatting” that went on. My “in-depth” research shows that God was preparing us for HVAC in the Old Testament in Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 that begins, “For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven”. Aside from the Byrds using those words in their 1965 hit “Turn, Turn, Turn”, the development of HVAC must be included as an “activity under heaven”. But I have more evidence! The final book of the New Testament is Revelations that tells us about Armageddon. Revelation 3:15-16 clearly (to me at least) refers to God’s wrath directed to people who try to make HVAC repairs themselves instead of calling a pro. It reads, “I know your works: you are neither cold nor hot. Would that you were either cold or hot! So, because you are lukewarm and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth”. Biblical scholars may disagree, but I will stand by my “interpretation”.
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